Uh, Oh..Cars go Boom, Boom!

Have you ever been in a vehicle when it hits another vehicle? You know that awful crunching sound from inside the car that screeches and screams, breaking and tearing away at plastic and glass. Yeah..that sound. One memory I have of that sound is when I was living in Jacksonville Florida. I was in a parking lot with a little two year old boy in the back seat that I was watching, saying over and over,as another car was whirling towards us....uh oh cars go boom, boom! Yes its an unforgettable sound. And yes..cars went boom..boom! Once you have heard it and the fear that it creates in your body, you never forget it. Yes...that is exactly how my day began today.


 I was running late for work this morning when I hurriedly said my goodbyes, took my lunch and purse and rushed out the door. Jumping into my mini van, I began to back up, not even thinking that my daughters boyfriend (Ethan's) car..or might I say his  BIG Dodge double cab truck was sitting behind my van. Then came the crunching and screeching of plastic hitting plastic and the breaking of a tail light.  Next thing I know my husband, daughter, and Ethan, came outside to see the damage, as the cars had announced to everyone there that they had just collided or rather the stupid driver collided them together.

I mean really...how could I miss the HUGE truck behind me?? So I say to my daughter, Lindsay ...this is what I am always talking to you about...situational awareness. I mean..this is such a classic example of observing your surroundings, but I didn't do that, just assuming that no one would be behind my car. Ethan wouldn't have even been there, except he came to pick Lindsay up to help her to school and carry her books etc...all because she can't right now because of her surgery. I got to work and felt so foolish because by this time I am really, really late. I cried....feeling stupid, and now putting out Ethan's family with the repairs. I still have to call the insurance company and tell them the stupid thing I done. I mean really..what is the adjuster by the name of Sam on the other end really thinking of me right now.... and on and on it goes. Until finally I have done such a fine job of beating myself up, that I just couldn't seem to rise above the feeling of stupidity. Of course the enemy stole my day from me once again. If at all he can remind me of the failures in my life, he always seems to be the winner by the end of the day. Why not be victorious over him...because I just could not allow myself to be. Isn't that it....allowing ourselves...giving ourselves permission to feel good about ourselves?

Read some of the  words to this Christina Perry song "A Thousand Years"

Time stands still
Beauty in all she is
I will be brave
I will not let anything take away
What’s standing in front of me
Every breath
Every hour has come to this
One step closer

I have died everyday waiting for you
Darling don’t be afraid I have loved you
For a thousand years
I love you for a thousand more

And all along I believed I would find you
Time has brought your heart to me
I have loved you for a thousand years
I love you for a thousand more

One step closer
One step closer

Can you hear Him? Can you Tracy...can you hear Me...calling you back tonight as you drive down this country road home? I sing this for you...listen to the words...I am singing these to your heart. You are too far from Me today...please one step closer...I am joy and strength...I am a very present help in trouble. I have loved you a thousand years...I will always love you. I have brought you today to this very place to hear Me..to come closer to Me.

And that is what I heard tonight in the car as I listened to that song. I heard Him speaking to me as if He was sitting in the car right beside me. He loves me. So maybe my insurance rates will increase..they do anyways without me having an accident. And maybe we need to purchase a new tail light for the van....accidents happen. Maybe I showed some vulnerability at the office, when I hate showing that emotion.... but that emotion showed me that others care for me in whatever state I am in. I am sure I caused some inconvenience for Ethan and his parents (sorry Ethan)....but it showed to me what a kind and caring person that my daughter is dating and what a wonderful person his parents have raised. I am positive I caused my husband more distress...but it showed me how much he loves me unconditionally (thanks Andy). I probably let my God down by letting my circumstances get the best of me...but it showed me that at the end of the day...He still loves me anyways. 

So although cars went BOOM, BOOM...in the end..its still only a car...they go down in value. My life lessons I am learning everyday...they continually go up in value!