This Way or That...That is the Question!

“You have brains in your head. You have feet in your shoes. You can steer yourself any direction you choose. You're on your own. And you know what you know. And YOU are the one who'll decide where to go...” 
― Dr. Seuss, Oh, the Places You'll Go!


Really thinking about this excerpt from the Dr. Seuss book..."Oh the Place You'll Go!"..gets me wondering if we really do decide where we go? We can choose the path, but the Lord tells us in Jeremiah that He knows our future. 


My family and I are definitely at some crossroads as of lately. We are going to Haiti in November, my husband and I, are. My daughter will join us down in Haiti the second week we will be there. We are excited and it felt more real to me when we finally went and began the passport processing yesterday. My daughter just got back only but a couple of weeks ago and she blessed our hearts with the stories and pictures from there. It was as if a fire that long ago went out was rekindled and lit. 


When I was but fifteen years old, I felt the leading that I was to be a missionary. I even looked into some Bible colleges and sent off for some literature. That year of my sophomore year of high school was a tough year for me. I felt so distant from everything and was really beginning to ask God what He wanted to do with me...what direction was I suppose to be going. But as teenagers are, that was fleeting and then came marriage at the age of eighteen. I had all four of my beautiful children by the ripe age of twenty nine. 


Here I am now thirty nine years old and am finally going to see the need for the Lord in other countries! I am excited and scared all in one, but as I sat tonight in the choir, I thought of that fifteen year old girl that had wondered if missions was the calling from God...and it is quite overwhelming to hear my Father say to me in that small still voice tonight.."Haiti is your mission." I am actually trembling typing this only because it feels unsure and unsafe to type that, but I know that I will come back to the USA a different person..I have seen my daughters metamorphosis and it is so beautiful!

I know the safest thing to type here tonight is that I am sure of one thing, and that is my salvation and assurance through my Jesus...and He promises to never leave nor forsake me, so that is comforting. In which direction He points, will be the door I walk through, knowing that He came and calls  the weak to be strong, the lame to walk again, the blind to see, the weary to unload all their burdens, the sick to trust, the tired to not be weary in well doing, the bitter to let go, the angry to release, the hungry to be filled, the thirsty to never thirst again, the hopeless to find hope in His promises, the sinner to come to repentance and the directionless to seek and He will show you the path.

What an EF4 Tornado Can Do and Not Do

Some weeks back we had a category EF4 tornado blow through our little town of Harrisburg IL. This is the timeline of that morning:

Whitney Houston and My Bloggers Block

Young Whitney Houston

Why does blogging seem hard lately? I have many things to be thankful for and I feel very blessed, but it seems to me that I have Bloggers Block as of lately. Its really frustrating...but am I am over thinking it too much...probably. I tend to do that with things. My husband tells me the other day, that I think about things too deeply sometimes, and that causes my downward spiral. It was the death of Whitney Houston that has gotten me to thinking about this life...was she seeking for serenity? I know she has the "Christian" songs out there, but that does not mean that she wasn't seeking for peace or that she knew that peace.

One Lone Bird

The Lone Bird

Its been some time since I last blogged. I am under the assumption that is due to the lack of inspiration. Curious isn't it? I began this blog to inspire myself...to find serenity in the smallest of things each day, yet I haven't felt inspired enough to even find the smallest things each day inspirational? Ah...I sense a presence of something more here...a common enemy the "joy zapper".. as I fondly name him. 


I was actually out again today running the roads, and I noticed a lone bird flying high in the sky. The skies had been threatening rain all day, but it still had not, at this point. You may wonder why one bird would even begin to get my attention, but it was not what it was doing, but what it was NOT doing.

Ten Random Acts of Kindness

Thoughts of kindness came upon me this last week. Random acts of kindness. You know those little things that get you through the day? We all do them, even the harshest of personalities will do a kind thing some times. I have met some real distasteful persons in my life, but even they can do kind things at times. There was a time when I went through a toll booth from the Illinois border into the Indiana border. The toll was sixty cents and out of the blue my daughter Lindsay says, "Mom pay for the car behind us!" I ask why and she says she thought it would just be kind. The person behind us didn't know us, but as we pulled away, I could see the toll booth person pointing at our car and you know what....it felt pretty good!

Relationships are Complicated

So I was thinking again the other day about relationships. I mean I am not forcing you to read my blog, and my insight may or may not be right, but to be able to freely type my thoughts and share them is pretty amazing!
Relationships are complicated in general  ..right? I dated my husband for two and half years before marriage, and it was...well...complicated at times.

Two Days... Till Friday

This week has been some what of a usual week with some unusual happenings. Funny things I would say. Maybe you will agree after I tell you of my last two days of pure insanity....by the way the definition of insanity, is doing the same thing over and over again, expecting a different conclusion. Hmmm? Questionable to say the least....I would definitely say that my last two days would very much be the definition of insanity.

Got Purpose?

I was reflecting today on an incident that happened back this last summer. I would venture to say it would have been called the "brink of death" for me. I was eating some venison steak one evening, as it seems to me that I have been on a low carb diet called the Primal Blue Print for six to seven months. Venison is a very dense steak and tends to be a bit drier. For anyone that does not know what venison is, it is deer meat. I absolutely love venison...especially a doe. This particular evening, my husband and I was enjoying a venison steak, when I took a bite a bit too big.

Cannibals Chicken Noodle Soup is Pure Bliss

Looking back over my week...I chuckle a bit at my youngest boy, Tad who hands down can, on a good day, beat any national comedian with the things that he says.On Tuesday I have school for my boys and my nephew. I teach spelling, english, reading and geography. This Tuesday I told the boys that I was going to only have grilled cheese sandwiches and soup for lunch. I heard the grumblings from three very disappointed little boys. Seth asks, "Mom, what kind of soup are we having?" I simply state," Campbells Chicken Noodle Soup." Tad looks at his brother and says "See Seth it is Cannibals chicken noodle soup!" So I guess that day we were going to be brutish, beast-like,anthropophagite, bush dwelling soup and sandwich eaters....he just didn't know it!

My Old Friend...Inner Turmoil

This story is referring back to an incident that happened last week to me. I have these beautiful American Indian choker necklaces that my husband bought for me, that I absolutely love. I have 2..one is black with the white bone..the other is brown wood-like beads with black. I chose to wear the black with brown and I went to town, into Walmart..thinking nothing of my amazing necklace...but someone else did. I noticed some folks were looking at my neck. Now please don't think me vain, but I am sure any woman reading this blog will agree (if she is honest with herself)  that she has been there...she has felt this at some point. We all have....

Uh, Oh..Cars go Boom, Boom!

Have you ever been in a vehicle when it hits another vehicle? You know that awful crunching sound from inside the car that screeches and screams, breaking and tearing away at plastic and glass. Yeah..that sound. One memory I have of that sound is when I was living in Jacksonville Florida. I was in a parking lot with a little two year old boy in the back seat that I was watching, saying over and over,as another car was whirling towards us....uh oh cars go boom, boom! Yes its an unforgettable sound. And yes..cars went boom..boom! Once you have heard it and the fear that it creates in your body, you never forget it. Yes...that is exactly how my day began today.

This is a Hold Up..Hand Over the Backpack!

Do you relate to the picture? I mean as a mother, wife, daughter, sister, grandchild , and as a woman do we ever feel that way? When I seen this picture today, it truly said how I was feeling today. Why do we  take on the "weight of the world" anyways? Is it expected by others, or are we our own worst enemies?

The Art of Wearing a Hospital Gown

The very art of wearing a hospital gown is overwhelming for some of us out there...right? I mean the hospital gown has its own cartoons, because they cause so much emotional distress. My daughter had her gallbladder surgery yesterday and as soon as the nurse set the folded hospital gown on the bed, I seen her eyes grow larger, pupils dilate, hands and feet began to sweat and her mouth began to get dry.

Lessons from Mammoth Cave

You know its funny, I was out running the other day thinking of a new blog post, when I remembered our trip to Kentucky to the Mammoth Cave. You wonder why I would be thinking about a big dark cave..right? There is this one particular moment at the beginning of our tour, that most sticks out in my mind.

Reverse Thinking

So this weekend we had our friends Craig , Kristy and their son Keith came down from Northern Indiana. They came on Friday evening and left this morning. My emotions got away from me again, and as they pulled away I cried. I cried for myself, I cried for my friendships so far away, I cried for that intimacy of having dear friends that love you unconditionally. Friends do bring serenity and peace in the lives of those that will allow those friends to bless you.

It's All in Your Perspective

Here I sit one hour from the new Year of 2012. What am I to expect this year? Only God knows. But I can tell you that I want to be in the center of His will. My friend made a wonderful statement today, when you are in the center of Gods will its the safest place to be. Pretty impressionable statement I thought. So why does things feel completely chaotic and out of control when you were pretty sure at the start of the day you were in Gods will for that day? It began by me taking this past Thursday off from work to take my daughter, son and another teenager in my church up to Springfield Illinois for a teen conference.